On first of april, u left ur fiance and ur best friend at ur hauz to get sumtin frm d market on getting home, u found out dat dey are no more in d living only to b found in ur bedroom. U paused for a minute dat wat cud ave been happening so u decided to enter, as u entered ur bedroom u saw both of dem on ur bed wrapped under d blanket. Bt to ur grtest surprised as u entered both shouted april fool. Wat will u do

HURRAY! YOU ARE THERE ALREADY
HAPPY NEW MONTH

LET US THANK GOD FOr Making
You And me see this gloRIOUS
MONTH..

JUST TYPE "THANK YOU" TO
HONOUR And APPRECIATE GOD...

A Professor at a lecture in INDIA was
explaining marketing concepts to the Students:
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" - That's Direct Marketing
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. Marry him." That's Advertising
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her Telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me." - That's Telemarketing
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of
the car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say: By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" - That's Public Relations
5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: You are very rich! Can you marry me?" - That's Brand Recognition
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - That's
Customer Feedback
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband. - That's
demand and supply gap
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives. - That's restriction for entering new markets........

A Professor at a lecture in INDIA was
explaining marketing concepts to the Students:
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" - That's Direct Marketing
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. Marry him." That's Advertising
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her Telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me." - That's Telemarketing
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of
the car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say: By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" - That's Public Relations
5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: You are very rich! Can you marry me?" - That's Brand Recognition
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - That's
Customer Feedback
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband. - That's
demand and supply gap
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives. - That's restriction for entering new markets........

#‎AKPOS FACTA LADY'S INBOX:1..I luv u dear (Bello)2..Can i take u out tonite? (Bassey)3..I always feel bad when I see u withanother man (Okoye)4.. Sweetie don't forget d trip (MD)5..Darling, av u seen d credit I sent u?(Collins)6..Honey, I will do whatever it takes justfor u to be by my side (Evans)7..Consider it done (Senator)8..Baby, check ur a/c bal and call meback (Chairman)A GUY'S INBOX:1..UR data bundle will soon expire (MTN)2..Hey dude, give me a break! I told uam married (Jane)3..Don't dare call me again, cheat(Patricia)4..Am warning u, let this month not be astory telling event like the last3 months (Landlord)5..Brother am still expecting d money ford NECO form (Junior bros)6..My pickin, you dey? Abeg send chopmoney quick, hunger wan finish us hereo (Mama)7.. I dey hospital, pls send d N120,000quick quick for d appendix operation oru can keep and use it for my burial(Papa)8..I av nt seen my period for 3 weeks(Neighbour's daughter)

#‎AKPOS FACT
A LADY'S INBOX:

1..I luv u dear (Bello)
2..Can i take u out tonite? (Bassey)
3..I always feel bad when I see u with
another man (Okoye)
4.. Sweetie don't forget d trip (MD)
5..Darling, av u seen d credit I sent u?
(Collins)
6..Honey, I will do whatever it takes just
for u to be by my side (Evans)
7..Consider it done (Senator)
8..Baby, check ur a/c bal and call me
back (Chairman)

A GUY'S INBOX:
1..UR data bundle will soon expire (MTN)
2..Hey dude, give me a break! I told u
am married (Jane)
3..Don't dare call me again, cheat
(Patricia)
4..Am warning u, let this month not be a
story telling event like the last
3 months (Landlord)
5..Brother am still expecting d money for
d NECO form (Junior bros)
6..My pickin, you dey? Abeg send chop
money quick, hunger wan finish us here
o (Mama)
7.. I dey hospital, pls send d N120,000
quick quick for d appendix operation or
u can keep and use it for my burial
(Papa)
8..I av nt seen my period for 3 weeks
(Neighbour's daughter)

#‎AKPOS FACTA LADY'S INBOX:1..I luv u dear (Bello)2..Can i take u out tonite? (Bassey)3..I always feel bad when I see u withanother man (Okoye)4.. Sweetie don't forget d trip (MD)5..Darling, av u seen d credit I sent u?(Collins)6..Honey, I will do whatever it takes justfor u to be by my side (Evans)7..Consider it done (Senator)8..Baby, check ur a/c bal and call meback (Chairman)A GUY'S INBOX:1..UR data bundle will soon expire (MTN)2..Hey dude, give me a break! I told uam married (Jane)3..Don't dare call me again, cheat(Patricia)4..Am warning u, let this month not be astory telling event like the last3 months (Landlord)5..Brother am still expecting d money ford NECO form (Junior bros)6..My pickin, you dey? Abeg send chopmoney quick, hunger wan finish us hereo (Mama)7.. I dey hospital, pls send d N120,000quick quick for d appendix operation oru can keep and use it for my burial(Papa)8..I av nt seen my period for 3 weeks(Neighbour's daughter)

#‎AKPOS FACT
A LADY'S INBOX:

1..I luv u dear (Bello)
2..Can i take u out tonite? (Bassey)
3..I always feel bad when I see u with
another man (Okoye)
4.. Sweetie don't forget d trip (MD)
5..Darling, av u seen d credit I sent u?
(Collins)
6..Honey, I will do whatever it takes just
for u to be by my side (Evans)
7..Consider it done (Senator)
8..Baby, check ur a/c bal and call me
back (Chairman)

A GUY'S INBOX:
1..UR data bundle will soon expire (MTN)
2..Hey dude, give me a break! I told u
am married (Jane)
3..Don't dare call me again, cheat
(Patricia)
4..Am warning u, let this month not be a
story telling event like the last
3 months (Landlord)
5..Brother am still expecting d money for
d NECO form (Junior bros)
6..My pickin, you dey? Abeg send chop
money quick, hunger wan finish us here
o (Mama)
7.. I dey hospital, pls send d N120,000
quick quick for d appendix operation or
u can keep and use it for my burial
(Papa)
8..I av nt seen my period for 3 weeks
(Neighbour's daughter)

akpos is back again.............

A machine who use to detect thieves was invented and it was taken to so many countries..In kenya,it caught 200 thieves in 2 minute..In Ghana,it caught 500 thieves in 3 minute..In USA,it caught 7000 thieves in 15 minute..In china,it caught 4000 thieves in 4 minute..In japan,it caught 3500 thieves in 6 minute..In Nigeria,the machine was stolen in 10 seconds...How many likes for Naija..

AKPOS IN A BIBLE QUIZ
Q: who is judas?
Akpos: a farmer and vegetarian.
Q: why?
Akpos: becos judas eats carrot.
Q: where is judas from? Akpos: Nigeria.
Q: which tribe?
Akpos: igbo.
Q: why?
Akpos: becos he loves money.
Q: what is Lazarus surname? Akpos: Comfort.
Q: why?
Akpos: becos wen Jesus came to
his grave, He shouted "Lazarus
Comfort".
Q: who are the brothers of Lazarus that climb
the tree to
see
Jesus?
Akpos: Aki n Popo.
Q: why?
Akpos: because he is a short man. Q:
complete this bible quote,
"many are called but..."
Akpos: many are called but few
have the credit to call back

AKPOS QUESTION!!!

You are in a public toilet...u realized there is no tissue so you searched your pocket and found a N1000 note and $100US..you then turned around and u saw an old bible...

Please be sincere,which of them will you use??...